Where to start looking
I do not know what I want anymore
You used to have opinions about your own life and now you mostly have preferences about lunch.
When someone asks what you want, you answer with what is sensible.
You are not unhappy exactly. You are unaccompanied by anything.
Wanting may have become unsafe rather than absent
If wanting something has cost you before, through disappointment, through a life that could not accommodate it, or through somebody who made it expensive, the sensible adaptation is to stop. That is not a personality trait. It is a learned economy, and it can be examined.
Some wants are still there and are not allowed
There is often a difference between what a person cannot find and what they can find and immediately dismiss. The second is more common. It also has a solvable shape.
There is nothing wrong with not knowing yet
The pressure to have an answer is largely external. Curiosity comes back before certainty does, and it comes back through contact with things rather than through thinking harder.
What this usually connects to
- What you are still curious about, however small.
- When you last changed your mind about something because you wanted to.
A question worth sitting with
- What would you want if nobody would be inconvenienced by it?
The session starts from what is actually there rather than from a list of values.
What do you actually want?It is a conversation, not a questionnaire. You can stop at any point, and finishing it does not mean anything has to change.
If the question turns out to be a different one