Resources
Everything worth your time on the question: Which of this is mine to solve?
Five things on this subject: one TAIU exercise, three things to read and one free service or course. Practical support sits first, before anything written to be interesting. Free, clinically grounded and available today if something here is heavier than an exercise can hold.
This page is for going further on your own. If you would rather work the question out with somebody asking, that is the conversation.
What can I change and what must I carry: talk it throughLEARN · FREE TOOL
NHS
Free, clinically grounded and available today if something here is heavier than an exercise can hold.
NHS self help for sleep, low mood, anxiety and stress, including a short personal plan.
TRY · 12 MIN
TAIU
Three columns for a situation that will not resolve neatly.
READ · BOOK
Steven Hayes, Kirk Strosahl and Kelly Wilson
The clinical case for describing what living alongside something actually involves, rather than using acceptance as a word that ends a conversation. Read it for the practical framing, not for the language.
READ · BOOK
Richard Lazarus and Susan Folkman
The origin of the distinction between tackling a problem and managing the response to it. The argument is that the right choice depends on whether the situation can actually be changed, which is exactly the judgement most people skip.
READ · RESEARCH
Fred Rothbaum, John Weisz and Samuel Snyder
The paper that separates changing a situation from adjusting to it, and treats both as forms of control rather than treating the second as defeat. Useful when the honest answer is that something will not move for now.
What helped you?
If you've read, watched, listened to or tried something that helped you think about this differently, we'd like to hear about it.
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