Resources
Everything worth your time on the question: What is required, what is sustainable and who else must help?
Six things on this subject: one TAIU exercise, four things to read and one free service or course. Practical support sits first, before anything written to be interesting. Most people caring for a parent are entitled to more support than they have claimed.
This page is for going further on your own. If you would rather work the question out with somebody asking, that is the conversation.
Caring for an ageing parent: talk it throughLEARN · GUIDE
Carers UK
Most people caring for a parent are entitled to more support than they have claimed.
Practical guidance on carer's assessments, benefits, work and looking after your own health.
READ · GUIDE
Age UK
Useful when the practical questions are the ones actually keeping you awake.
Care, money, housing and health guidance for older people and their families.
TRY · 12 MIN
TAIU
Care that does not erase the person providing it.
Organises care so the person providing it remains visible in their own life.
READ · BOOK
Atul Gawande
Gawande on what people actually want at the end of life, which is usually not what their families are organising for them. Difficult and clarifying.
READ · BOOK
Karl Pillemer
Pillemer's research on family estrangement and repair, based on interviews with hundreds of families rather than on theory.
READ · RESEARCH
Steven Zarit
The work behind the caregiver burden scale. It makes the load measurable, which matters when one person is quietly carrying most of it.
What helped you?
If you've read, watched, listened to or tried something that helped you think about this differently, we'd like to hear about it.
We review recommendations before sharing them with the community.